The Sam is Samuel I. Am-Chubbington Lord. He will be eight years old on July 4, 2008. He is a pretty large cat, a little over 18.5 pounds of pure love. He is considered the right weight for his “height”, so he gets upset when folks refer to him as “Fatass”. He is gray and white and has a little pink nose.
Last year, due to what the vet thinks is a hereditary issue, The Sam had to have all of his teeth removed, but that has not really changed his eating habits too much.
This past winter, we experienced a larger mouse problem than we have in the years before, so The Sam has earned the title of “Chief of Security, Mouse Patrol”. He started a “Catch and Release” program, though (maybe because of his lack of teeth?), much to the horror of Mommy! (But then, DEAD things in the apartment tend to horrify Mommy, too…)
Eventually, I will write the whole story of how this remarkable, lovable, not-so-little being came into our lives and made us a family. I will write the history of the Sam and all of his kitty adventures (and misadventures!), and will regale you with tales of his many conquests.
For now, here are some of the most important things to know about the Sam:
1. Sam was born in a kennel and has an affinity for dogs, especially for dogs with his gray/white colour scheme.
2. Sam loves to play Fetch.
3. Although Sam is something of a momma’s boy, most of the time, his daddy is his toy of choice.
4. Sam has a foot fetish.
5. Sam supervises the preparation of the Thanksgiving Turkey each year (and the preparation of most meals throughout the year).
6. Favourite pastimes (aside from Fetch and rough-housing with his daddy) include: napping, long grooming sessions, Towel Time, creating new folders on the desktop, praying for milk at the refrigerator door, waking his mom up at 4am every day just to cuddle, fish-tastings, scratching the furniture or spot of carpet NEXT to one of his many scratching posts/pads, stealing french fries (especially MacDonald’s french fries!), following his paternal grandma around like a puppy when she visits, hunting down mice, doing his best to keep the bed from being made, getting kitty back-rubs from Auntie Jeanne, attacking pieces of string and things that resemble pieces of string, catching and munching on moths, splashing water at folks when they are relaxing in a nice hot bath, reading the Sunday papers with mommy, avoiding his carrier at all costs, spying on visitors from one of his favourite spots, sampling catnip, interrupting phone conversations, and plotting Mikey’s demise.
7. Favourite places to hang out include (in no particular order): on Mommy’s lap, usually with his head stuffed into her armpit, the comfy chair in the living room, stretched out in the center of the bed, perched precariously on the edge of the end table, with front paws on the windowsill, face smooshed up against the glass or screen, pressed up against the bottoms of grandma’s feet, using one of mommy’s calves as a body pillow, perched on a pillow over Daddy’s head while he sleeps (usually drooling onto Daddy’s eyelids), in a laundry basket filled with clothes fresh from the dryer, under the printer table (all the better to grab feet as they pass by!), and on the desk, directly between Mommy’s face and the monitor!
8. Favourite food items include: turkey, french fries, salmon, fresh cod, lobster, crab, moths, beetles, flounder, tuna, trout, rainbow trout, duck, fresh roasted chicken, bacon, baked yams (skin and all), steamed zucchini, veggie lasagna, Mommy’s meatloaf, Grandma’s egg rolls, Grandma’s stir-fry, steamed rice, General Tso’s Chicken, any kind of gravy, salsa con queso, chili, scrambled eggs, shrimp cocktail, milk, sour cream, cream cheese, cottage cheese, stuffed clams, Mommy’s Alfredo sauce, taco pie, any kind of sushi roll, cooked tomatoes/sauce, meatballs, cooked cabbage, cooked carrots, kielbasa, and the occasional veggie pizza (he doesn’t like the crust too much, though).
Coming soon: How we became Sam’s Peeps!
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